What a fucking waste of an outfit
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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