I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
