yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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