He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
