$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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