friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
false alarm, still single
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