smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
