I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
