I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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