I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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