i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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