At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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