No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
