This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
