He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
