super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
