i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I want a musical about memes.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
