Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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