I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
