I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
