this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
