her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize