I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
