Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
