So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
