do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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