You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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