I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
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