There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
