I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
