um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
