you would pick up someone in the library
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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