Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
