Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
