well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
