Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize