Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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