if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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