You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
