as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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