where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I bet he comes in French.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
