i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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