I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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