Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
