Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
