If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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