My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
