it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
