Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
