i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
